This is a rewrite of the classic lullaby with realistic actions instead of bizarre purchasing practices.

The original rhymes but I couldn’t be stuffed trying to make this rhyme.

Hush little baby don’t say a word, papas going to quickly check your nappy

If you’re still crying after a nappy change papas going to check if you’ve been fed recently.

If you’ve been fed and you’re still crying, papas going to try and give you a cuddle.

If you’re crying in papas arms, he’s going to try standing up while cuddling you.

If that still hasn’t changed your mind. Papas going to start pacing back and forward.

If pacing back and forward hasn’t stopped your crying, Papas going to keep on doing it for another hour

If you’re still crying after that hour. Papas going to tag out and pass you to mama.

If you’re still crying after being with mama. Papas going to try it all over again.